Easing into anal sex....

[a_boy_toy_for_u]

Hi folks, I enjoy exploring my bi-side with men. Have given and received oral (and loved it!) but really fantasizing about being taken by a man. A little nervous about taking a penis inside the first time - any advice?

[SeanBi]

Get to know and like the guy - don't be a one-night stand.

[junior8]

Im still looking for my first time with a guy but I have had women use strap ons on me and it was so intense and my orgasms were so intense as well.I think that is the best advice look for and get to know someone before it happens.

[proseros]

Well uh- I think the first thing you might wanna do is learn how to take a dick in the first place?

Get to know your ass.

And to appreciate the sensations penentration offer you - now, except that you can't just pull this thing out when you want to, and have to teach your body to experience submission.

Return the favor of enduring
Mine own violence
Declaring this Love? (http://main.bisexual.com/forum/showthread.php?t=4871)

a little crossreferencing fun there...

A man should be able to take a dick as honorably as a soldier takes a bullet.

Yeah, get to know your ass and develop a relationship with it as a instrument of experiencing and expressing your real love for this other guy. No you are not "giving yourself up" more than your allowing yourself and your partner to experience one another this way as a means of acknowledging the emotive attraction that circulates and flows between you.

In line with SeanBi (http://main.bisexual.com/forum/member.php?u=64196)'s adivice - don't be a whore [I use this term generically]. respond to your pansexual urges from your heart, not your horn, respect and nuture the opportunities afforded by this uniquely inclusive construct of your character and being. If your retain nothing from the experience you will still have acquired a good friend and brother with whom you have procured an enduring platonism that expands the horizon of your human socialization.

[shameless agitator]

I agree with the earlier posts. I would add lube, lots of lube. If you've never had any kind of penetration, you may want to start with digital & work your way up from there. Maybe spend some time with small dildos first. I've only done digital so far & the one time I tried to bottom for a guy, it just wasn't happening. He was too big & I was too tight. That, I can tell you was incredibly frustrating.

[mvic1313]

Hi folks, I enjoy exploring my bi-side with men. Have given and received oral (and loved it!) but really fantasizing about being taken by a man. A little nervous about taking a penis inside the first time - any advice?

i love it! need a guy with some experience though. have to take it sloooooow!
lotsa lube, and look for a guy with a smaller penis! keep in mind it will hurt a bit no mater what you do at first, but it goes away as you keep going. nothing like it. why dont you go get a dildo or something and start out that way first?

[jeancarleo]

Ok first of all when you get in the shower try using a finger and do it slowly until u get it all the way inside and then the next day try 2 fingers and the next day 3 but start the days with one finger and work your way. That prepares you for being a bottom but don't do your first time with any guy.
it has to be special since you will never forget thiat special first time you had dick inside you.

My first time as a bottom: I was dating a bottom guy and after some days I convinced him after having sex with him to fuck me. He didn't really wanted to because it didn't gave him any pleasure but it was like whatevers for him. So he used a lot of lube and he did it all slowly and I did not feel no pain but pure pleasure. His dick was normal 6.5 inches long and girth about 2 inches or so and it felt good all the way in that since that experience I have always wanted to play both roles. So you need to be patient and take it slow, don't rush things and always use protection ;)

[dafydd]

Ok first of all when you get in the shower try using a finger and do it slowly until u get it all the way inside and then the next day try 2 fingers and the next day 3 but start the days with one finger and work your way. That prepares you for being a bottom but don't do your first time with any guy.
it has to be special since you will never forget thiat special first time you had dick inside you.

My first time as a bottom: I was dating a bottom guy and after some days I convinced him after having sex with him to fuck me. He didn't really wanted to because it didn't gave him any pleasure but it was like whatevers for him. So he used a lot of lube and he did it all slowly and I did not feel no pain but pure pleasure. His dick was normal 6.5 inches long and girth about 2 inches or so and it felt good all the way in that since that experience I have always wanted to play both roles. So you need to be patient and take it slow, don't rush things and always use protection ;)

just make sure you use a condom!

d

[MrOzGuy]

Ans listen to the person who you may be penetrating, they set the pace. If they say slow down or say Not so deep, then listen!!!!

(Last experience...both a little too drunk, although I think I got a little used as he gave up and went to bed after he got off...leaving me hard and dry...Then again it could have something to do with it being his first experience...I think....then again too drunk to know...now I can't contact him!!! Grrr)

:mad:

[31cho]

Hi folks, I enjoy exploring my bi-side with men. Have given and received oral (and loved it!) but really fantasizing about being taken by a man. A little nervous about taking a penis inside the first time - any advice?
Take your time and use plenty of lube and a rubber.But when you get use to it you will enjoy it.Have fun.

[jeancarleo]

Of course a condom LOL I knew I was missing something but I did say use protection right?:tong:

[HighEnergy]

Lube, lots of lube, and very slow to start. When you think surely you've got too much lube, it's just about right. Oh, and someone's ass is NOT the place to prove your stamina!

[anteak]

I have been fucked many times and found it to be a most enjoyable acctivity. Of course lube is neccessary, Your body will tell you if your doing it right. Some discomfort is going to happen but proceed at a pace that is enjoyable and you may find that the stretching is part of the pleasure, I did. I never had a cock to large that I couldn't take it and appreciated that wonderful feeling as it pumped in and out till he plunged in and pushed as his cock pulsed and unloaded inside me. I feel I know why women like to have a cock inside their pussies.

[HighEnergy]

I feel I know why women like to have a cock inside their pussies.

There is no comparison. It's an absolutely different animal.

[onewhocares]

I agree with all the comments above. Getting to know the person, and expressing your desires through open and truthful communication is key in my mind. Make sure you are both on the same path. His mind is the best sexual instrument I find. Foreplay for me is key in that area and feeling nice and relaxed is essential. I like the thoughts of bathing or showering first to avoid any cleanliness issues.....play in a tub or shower maybe just the right thing to bring you to the wonderful world of anal sex. If it hurts, then you are doing something wrong. Expect to spend a good amount of time...this is not an item for a quickie. LOTS and LOTS of lube is best and ALWAYS wear a condom.

Not everytime is perfect and for me getting the rhythm just right is key. Yes size does matter, but you can be creative for sure. Start with toys and build up from there.

Enjoy the wonders that await you.....

Belle

[dafydd]

There is no comparison. It's an absolutely different animal.

out of interest, can u elaborate?

d

[innaminka]

Lube, lots of lube, and very slow to start. When you think surely you've got too much lube, it's just about right. Oh, and someone's ass is NOT the place to prove your stamina!


Pretty much sums it up; and as the quote says, go slowly and don't spend all day there. :eek:

[Alaskaman]

All the advice is good. With my first time discomforit was mininmal and rapidly disappeared. But I had prepared.

When it looked like we were headed that way--he wanted to move beyond oral and was quite experienced--I started with solitary training. As suggested, a favorite finger or two, followed by a slender dildo and then a butt plug. Not at the same time. You have retrain that little hole, you know.

When I finally lost my anal cherry, first we had some oral play to make me hot, then lots of lube, a gentle exploring finger, more lube and then the main event. The big thing--no, not his endowment--was that he was loving and wanted my pleasure to be as close to his as possible. It seemed to me that he made that goal, although his grunts were lounder than my moans.

And practice safe sex.

[sirriusmwm50]

One last thing - buy one of those fleet enema's, the saline type and use it about 2 hours prior. It is nice to feel very clean and your partner will certainly appreciate it. The rest of the advice has been very good. Go slow, lots of lube, good partner, ENJOY!!!

[Sapphrodite]

My Advice: Click on advanced Search and type in "anal" and then 'search titles only' - there are already 35 different threads specifically about anal sex (and 440 threads that include the mention of anal).

Here are a few of the good ones that you can use for advice and support:
http://main.bisexual.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1647
http://main.bisexual.com/forum/showthread.php?t=4605
http://main.bisexual.com/forum/showthread.php?t=4762
http://main.bisexual.com/forum/showthread.php?t=2408
http://main.bisexual.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1178
http://main.bisexual.com/forum/showthread.php?t=3822
http://main.bisexual.com/forum/showthread.php?t=3240
http://main.bisexual.com/forum/showthread.php?t=3074
http://main.bisexual.com/forum/showthread.php?t=3065
http://main.bisexual.com/forum/showthread.php?t=2434
http://main.bisexual.com/forum/showthread.php?t=2526
http://main.bisexual.com/forum/showthread.php?t=688


Good luck, and folks - be sure to use your Search buttons first... you can often find a lot of information or add onto an existing thread about your topic.

[DiamondDog]

If it hurts, then you are doing something wrong.

Not true, some people aren't that anally inclined or aren't wired for anal sex or simply don't enjoy it and it's uncomfortable/painful even when everything is done correctly.

[HighEnergy]

out of interest, can u elaborate?

d

The vagina doesn't have the sphincter the anus does, so entering it is a much easier process. It's not as tight. It doesn't involved the vagal nerve. It self lubes. And it's a great place to prove that stamina thing! It's not apples and oranges. It's more like comparing apples and broccoli.

Any other ladies like to take a stab at this?

[lonelygirlintx]

I REALLY have to agree with HighEnergy. It's definitely not the same at all. My first time was spectacular, but you definitely gotta go slow, trust your partner, my experience was with my husband, we were very young at the time, so it was both our first time doing that. We trusted each other, took each other's feelings and desires into consideration and just let loose. It was so much fun and I'd happily do it again!!!

Stay safe and enjoy the experience.

[a_boy_toy_for_u]

Wow - great advice all. Ladies - please continue to expand on the essential differences between anal and vaginal intercourse - something no guy will ever be able to explain and very interesting!

Anyone tried to use muscle relaxants for anal sex? I'm thinking off-the-shelf like Robaxecet or similar. Does it help to loosen things down there or reduce possible pain on entry? Not into drugs including poppers...

[proseros]

I'd say more important than 'easing' into anal sex -physically, that is, preparing to one's back blown out- is the level of personal communication and preparation that go into the practice of sexual love between men. No amount of lubrication can take the place of confidence and trust that anything will or can take place in a pleasurable and meaningful way.

One should treat this no differently than would otherwise, and in fact there is room for and even higher degree of mutual exchange and willingness to let down one's guard -call it masculine arrogance- enough to conduct the affair
with as much genuine affection and care as possible. Remember you are using your body to assume a particular 'role' and that will require you to turn down your yang and turn up your yin so you can become reciprocal to ravishing of another male- and love it.

Everything from bathing, douching the rectal cavity, gradually adjusting the sphincter using forms of deep digital massage and other assessories, before penetration is even attempted, should all be part of personalised experience shared with your gent; that includes a mature perspective about the otherwise undesirable 'fecal' element involved that you obviously want to avoid, the care and (not) handling of which along these lines to be no less regarded as a natural aspect of anal sex that as a matter of course incorporates a healthy attitude and awareness of colon care and function.

There is no 'easy' way of getting things in your ass, but that doesn't mean the way cannot eased with a little concientious and gently loving fun.

[guynice]

Do you douche before anal play/intercourse?

[bemyonlyone]

I can honestly say I don't want anything in or around my butt. I'm not into any butt things. I don't want to lick anyone's butt, or put anything in someone's butt, and I don't want anything done to my butt. An experience at the doctor was bad enough, that's the closest I'll get, I can't imagine doing it voluntarily.

As far as sex is concerned mine doesn't exist and neither does that of the other person. The anus is not sexual to me.

I know that men sometimes like having things shoved up their butts...even straight guys, haha. I just couldn't bring myself to do it, even if he really wanted me to. I just can't.

[Mature59]

I found that being the one to take charge as for anal sex. My first time was to ride the guy, so that i could control the pace of his cock going into me. After it was in I let my butt get use to it then i started riding it up and down until he came.

First times are great as long as your the one to start and end it.